Saturday, March 15, 2008

Mink coat anyone?

The little fucker. He got away.... This time. You'll have to wait for the coat. It'll be a small coat, I hope you don't mind. Maybe a nice stole for your daughter, when she's only a month old.

Who cares what the activists might say? Fuck them. It wasn't their Uniqua that the mink killed and dismembered after sucking the blood out of her neck. That's what they do, you know. The disgusting blood-sucking vampire rats.

Uniqua was our one 'pet' chicken. Out of the 40 hens out there, she was the one that would flee the coop every morning. She would greet us at the gate when the truck pulled in, or would be curled up on the mat at the sliding doors. She would eat the dog food out of the dishes right alongside our big dogs and had snuck into the house on more than occasion, only to settle in under the living room table. She would follow B.Rube around the yard while he worked and would let the kids pet her brown feathers.
Yesterday, we found Uniqua dead and pulled partially under the henhouse. The poor thing.

A few years ago, some animal-loving horse's ass had a brilliant idea one night, and freed an entire farm of minks in our area.
"Duhhhhhhhhhh - did you think for even a minute about the eco-system, Mr. Social Activist??? about what effect the cute little fuzzy minks would have on the environment around them??? about where/how they would find food, now that they weren't being provided it???"
I know. I know.

This one's for you, chicken legs. We'll miss you.
And we'll get that fucker. In your name.

1 comment:

Renee said...

You never told me that you occasionally had a chicken laying under your living room table. I think I'm going to learn lots of new, interesting tidbits about you via this blog. :) I'm sorry about Uniqua. :(

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